What's on in Cardiff?

I'm not a massive fan of Valentine's - maybe because I'm an old married woman now and think that doing the washing up is a more romantic gesture than buying flowers. Perhaps because I briefly worked in catering and think of it as the night that teenagers with disposable income and old couples without anything in common anymore but their long-flown-from-the-nest children pay over the odds for chef's lazily constructed special menu that has been tripled in cost due to the calendar date. Anyway, I do still believe in romance, and there's nothing to stop you from making that gesture on February 14th - so long as it doesn't mean that the other 364 days are a dearth of affectionate behaviour.

The main thing is to get away from the intolerable tedium of champagne, chocolate and roses. Or overbooked restaurants. I won't even mention the disaster that is 'saucy' underwear bought in the wrong size and an outrageous colour. It's classier to clumsily paw at your girlfriend than buy them hooker's workwear and pretend that it isn't a present for you. 

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways...
Show your lover that you love them with all your senses, and buy a small gift for each of theirs - taste, touch, sight, sound and smell. It's so simple to do (truffles, a silk scarf, a book they'll enjoy, a CD and a bath bomb). Boots don't do it, you can't buy it from Tesco, there's no package set from play.com. It shows you've thought about them and what they'd like. 

Taking it long term.
Flowers die, chocolate gets eaten in days (hours?) and wine is gone in no time - try getting something that you'll look back at in September and remember Valentine's. Potted plants or silk flowers. A cookery book with promises to cook from it. Matching wine glasses (it's so nice to have a good set - or wine charms are lovely) to accompany a nice wine. And do think about getting a rose - there are some really gorgeous pink wines out there at the moment that are lighter than reds and less dry than whites.

Sacrifice
Sometimes there's something that your partner loves (heavy metal concerts, morris dancing competitions, professional badminton tournaments) that just really isn't your bag, but they wouldn't really want to go to on their own. Buy the tickets and suck it up - this won't work if you fidget right the way through. Think about taking them to the opera/ballet/ferret-juggling and make sure that they have the best possible time. It's only a few hours of your life.

Whatever you do, take five minutes away from the commercialised nonsense of the whole shebang to appreciate each other. It doesn't cost a thing and it makes you realise how rich you really are.

Guest post by Alys Kowalik who writes a Cardiff based food blog here: http://cfchef.wordpress.com/